I don’t usually ‘do’ Facebook quizzes, but today, I saw a friend post a few sentences about what her life was like at age 16. Her status invited her friends to play the ‘Age Game’ with her – she would assign us a number and we would have to answer questions about our lives at that age.
I was intrigued, and I was running out of reasons to postpone folding the laundry, so I asked my friend to give me an age. She soon emailed back with this response: ‘Your age is 20.’
I did some quick math. I was 20 years old fifteen years ago. Not too far back in the annals of time, but the pertinent point here is that I was 20 years old loooong before my mind was warped by the sleep deprivation and relentless demands of parenthood. It took a little while for me to clear the mental cobwebs surrounding the year 1995-1996, but when the dust cleared, this is how I answered my Age Game questions:
When I was 20 years old,
I wanted to be: a singer, and/or married to Jonathan Lupton
I was in a relationship with : Jonathan Lupton. We actually started dating on my birthday.
I had an undying love for: Jonathan Lupton
I was scared of: things not working out with Jonathan Lupton
I was best friends with: Jonathan Lupton and Erin McQuade
Geez. No wonder the National Women’s Liberation people won’t return my calls. Here’s the full scoop on the year I spent being twenty years old…
In 1995, I was a junior in college, and this is where I lived:
That’s Doane Hall on the campus of Eastern University, where I was studying music and yes, also falling in love with one Jonathan Lupton. Jon and I met the first day of college, and I was head-over-heels for him less than a week after that first meeting. Two years later, on my 20th birthday, he finally got with the program by giving me a picture frame I had admired in F.A.O. Schwartz in NYC a few weeks before. He had driven back to New York from our school near Philly just to get it for me.
Aaaaaawwwww!
So, Jon and I were deep, deep, deep in young love the year I turned 20, and looking back from this distance, it is the defining feature of that year. Sure, I had my classes. I played the Baker’s Wife in the school production of Into the Woods. I gave my junior year recital – a musical event remarkable only for the fact that I forgot the first words to my first song and had to ask my accompanist to give me the text (winning!). I worked in the college mailroom. I think I may have damaged a parked car outside a church in suburban Philadelphia while driving a 15-passenger van emblazoned with my alma mater’s logo.
When I wasn’t committing hit-and-runs with college-owned vehicles, I was with Jon. We made the transition from best friends to boyfriend/girlfriend and then made the leap to affianced people:
The rest, as they say, is history.
My gut reaction to my own responses to the Age Game questions was not favorable – it doesn’t look good for a woman to seem (even in retrospect) that she’s all about her man. I wished that my friend had given me a different year of my life – like this year, when I have an undying love for the internet and I’m scared every day that my jeans won’t fit anymore. (That sounds better than being all hung up on a guy. Right?)
But now that I’ve given it some more thought, the year I turned 20 changed the direction of my whole life, even though it makes me look a little bit like a stalker on paper. If the events of that year turned out differently, I honestly can’t say where I would be or what I’d be doing. Maybe I’d be better off, maybe worse, but look at what I have today – how could I settle for anything else?
Seriously- the picture frame made me tear up! While sure it seems that age 20 is all about one Jonathan Lupton if it weren’t you might not be here in the ‘hood and well…. i can’t even talk about that!
A-dorable. Sure am glad you “are where you are today…” 🙂 Just imagine where MEG would be without YOU: wedding dress-less (and perhaps more importantly, wedding undergarment-less), drinking-in-the-street buddy-less, free talk therapy session-less. That’s no way to live, my friend. Love you…AND one Jonathan Lupton.