Conversations with the kids today

Evan (fussing on the playset): ‘Moooooom!  Moooooom!’

Me (poking head out of house): ‘ Are you hurt?’

E: ‘No.’

Me: (turns to go inside)

E: ‘Mooooom!  I need help!’

Me: ‘No, you don’t.’  (Leaves.)


Note from Hailey after I scolded her for doing something I asked her not to do:

‘I am so so so so so so so so soopr Dume’

Me:  ‘Hailey, everyone makes mistakes.  I make mistakes all the time.  It doesn’t make me dumb.  You make mistakes.  It’s okay.  You aren’t dumb and I don’t want you calling yourself dumb.’


Me: ‘Evan, put your shoes on and we’ll be ready to go.’

(two minutes pass)

Me: ‘Evan, put your shoes on.’

(one minute)

Me: ‘Evan, put your shoes on.’

(another minute)

Me: ‘Evan, just PUT YOUR DAMN SHOES ON!’


Evan (after a scolding for not being good in a store): ‘YOU ARE BEING MEAN TO ME!  AND EVEN AFTER TOMORROW, I STILL WON’T PLAY ON THE PLAYGROUND!’  (He has a tendency to yell out some punishment for himself that I have not inflicted when he feels that he’s in trouble.)


Hailey: ‘Evan __________________.’  (Fill in the blank with ‘laughed at me’, ‘hurt my feelings’, etc.)

Me: ‘Deal with it, okay?  If you want to eat tonight, I can’t take care of it.’

(Hailey persists)

Me: ‘Hailey, people are going to be laughing at you your whole life, so you’re going to need to grow a thicker skin.’

H: ‘No, they’re NOT!’


Hailey: ‘I can’t believe that someday Midnight won’t be here because he’ll be dead.’

Me: ‘I know, but is he dead right this second?’

H: ‘No.’

Me: ‘Then we don’t have to worry about it right now.  We can enjoy being with him.’

H (crying): ‘I don’t want to die.’

Me: ‘I know.’

(We spoon on the bed and I hold her.)


Hailey brought home a bunch of papers from school at the end of the year.  Among them, a list she wrote with a picture, entitled, ’10 Things I know about my Mom’.  I’ll correct her spelling so it’s clear what she’s saying…

10 Things I Know About My Mom

1. She does not like Sponge Bob.

2. She loves me.

3. She doesn’t like our dog.

4. She teaches music.

5. She loves blue.

6. She cannot keep things alive.  (She means plants.)

7. She is a good mom.

8. She is a good cook.

9. She loves flowers.

10. She runs fast.


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